Living Your Best Life – Showing Up for Yourself
Tag Archives: Gentleman
Bawdy Beard Behavior – Do Not Try This at Home (Even If the Internet Tries to Convince You Otherwise)
It is certainly a curious time in history as we navigate the ever-changing world of social media. To be sure, the inventors of the Internet could not have imagined the massive amount of misinformation that can spread almost instantaneously across the world. Indeed, some of the information disseminated can be harmful and sketchy, but some content leans into the comedic and unserious side of the World Wide Web. The latest trending tomfoolery touted as truth arrives in the form of an elder statesman and the playful application of his cologne. His over-the-top theatrics have deluged my social media timeline for the greater part of the past week. So, what is it that has spawned thousands of followers, social media challenges, and satirical spinoffs?
Effortlessly employing a saucy, seductive sleight of hand, he dispenses a mist of cologne before swiftly snatching the molecules out of midair and applying the scented notes to his manly beard. Alas, this was merely a form of frolicsome foreplay before he passionately, provocatively pelvic pumps either the air or the nearest furniture in the area whilst referring to his “big” engine. Honestly, it is quite entertaining and hilarious. However, I have to be that guy and pour a little cold water on this steamy, scented ritual. Unfortunately, many individuals will believe that applying cologne to their beard is the new preferred method. Now, I am not going to write a lengthy opposition piece here; rather, I will just present some honest facts.
Cologne is generally 70-90% alcohol. That being said, knockoff colognes tend to use higher concentrations of alcohol and synthetics than some reputable brands. The skin on your face is delicate; some faces are more sensitive than others. Therefore, it would be wise not to apply cologne to your beard and face. There is a risk of irritating and drying out your skin. Your beard may become dry and scraggly. Seriously, who wants a dry, brittle beard that looks like hay on the face? As a gentleman nearing 50 years of age, and probably rocking a beard for 30 years, I have never seen a recommendation for cologne being rubbed into one’s beard.
Sure, his performative piece on the Internet is perhaps not inflicting any damage on his beard. However, trust me, there will be that one guy who will take this act as gospel, and he will proceed to spray cologne directly into his beard. I have even seen gentlemen with no beard rubbing cologne mist on their bare face. Again, the short videos are funny. However, can we please recognize and acknowledge beard care basics? Drink plenty of water and stay hydrated. Maintain beard health with a dedicated beard wash, conditioner, balm, and oil. Comb and brush your beard to detangle hair and stimulate growth. Besides, no way am I spraying my good cologne in the air to “snatch” it and then dry hump the air for an Internet flex. I’m too old for all that jazz.
The Standard #66
Sometimes a gentleman will unexpectedly discover himself in an unfamiliar, perhaps unwelcoming environment. It is easier said than done, but do not burden yourself with debilitating worry. Undoubtedly, the immediate surroundings and circumstances present new challenges. Moreover, a gentleman’s growth and development may be temporarily stunted; you may have even regressed to some degree. Nevertheless, the gentleman retains the core qualities that define his character and resolve. To be certain, an unanticipated arrival of adverse conditions should never erase the blueprint responsible for personal prosperity and earned excellence. Smartly leaning into the attributes and purpose that guided you to success, trust, and you will flourish once again.
Pictured is a black-eyed Susan that I transplanted from my sister-in-law’s yard to my own. The first picture I snapped was shortly after planting. The voyage was quite rough for her; she was in bad shape. Nevertheless, with an attentive hand and measured care, she has been able to bounce back after a few short weeks. Black-eyed Susans are said to symbolize endurance and resilience. It can thrive in harsh soil, tolerate scorching heat, and resist early frost. You may find yourself in a new situation. You may find yourself weathering harsh new conditions. You may find yourself wilting under the weight of weariness and woe. However, your purpose calls upon you to survive, revive, and thrive in any environment. Never forget your identity. Never forget your foundation. Never forget your greatness.
Style & Scents – L’Homme Idéal Parfum – Guerlain Paris
There are some fragrances on the market that, when smartly paired with proper gentlemanly attire, the gentleman fully understands he is going to be a problem – in a spicy sort of way. Now, let us assume you are that rakish gentleman, and your presentation is sartorially immaculate. Well, Guerlain L’Homme Ideal Parfum wholly understands the assignment. This is a fine fragrance formulated specifically for you. This is elegance, confidence, and masculinity all secured within one bottle. Guerlain L’Homme Ideal Parfum is a 2024 release created by perfumer Delphine Jelk for Guerlain Paris. Guerlain scents are widely recognized for its mature and sophisticated approach to fragrances. And as an older gentleman, I am leaning more towards colognes that project maturity without smelling woefully dated. Guerlain L’Homme Ideal Parfum checks all the right boxes. Let’s tap in.
- Guerlain L’Homme Ideal Parfum arrives with a modest, minimalist presentation. Straight out of the box, you will be handling a densely constructed glass bottle with a moderate bit of heft. Do not drop this beauty on your foot. The bottle is a beautiful geometric square, with the cologne housed within a smaller, square-shaped compartment inside. A simple dark grey label with the fragrance name is centered. The black cap snaps securely in place with the Guerlain emblem, two intertwined cursive letter Gs, etched on the top. The design is indeed very basic, but tasteful. Nonetheless, the bottle takes cues from the scent itself, clean and bold without the desperate need to be loud. I like it a lot.
- Now, let’s dive into the note breakdown. Top Notes: bergamot, orange blossom, spices, and almond. Middle notes: rose, vanilla, and leather. Base notes: vetiver, sandalwood, and tonka bean.
- Did You Know? The scent of bergamot & cherry are known for reducing stress, quieting anxiety, improving sleep, and balancing one’s mood. Moreover, studies show that vanilla has been associated with to elevating a person’s mood, relaxation, and reducing negative emotions.
- Guerlain L’Homme Ideal Parfum is a smooth, mellow fragrance that sits tightly on the gentleman’s skin. It is warm, rich, and deep. The amaretto delivers a beautifully refined cherry scent, but it is not overly sweet. It starts off with a bit of energy, but quickly tones down into the woody notes. The woody notes are not strong to my nose, so don’t expect an outdoorsy vibe here.
- It is not the type of scent that will jump off a gentleman’s skin and fill a room. If you are looking for a scent that yells its arrival, this is not the fragrance for you. Slightly boozy and balanced, it is designed to pull a person in for closer inspection. Nevertheless, there is a fine line here. A gentleman can quickly go from sensual to suffocating. I made the error of over-spraying, and while it may not have choked out a room, it certainly had me in a stranglehold. Proceed with caution, 3-4 sprays would be a safe bet. And you can expect 6-7 hours of longevity.
- Ideally, this scent is a fall and winter fragrance, but cool evenings in the spring offer the perfect opportunity to extend its service. Michigan is on the cooler side this year, so I have been able to wear it more. Summer heat would be just too much.
- Guerlain L’Homme Ideal Parfum is for the understated, classy gentleman that does not beg for attention, yet he unsurprisingly commands it. Strictly business in nature, and best worn during the evening hours, Guerlain L’Homme Ideal Parfum should be worn when the moment demands a touch sophistication, masculinity, and confidence.
- Guerlain L’Homme Ideal Parfum retails for $199.00 3.4 oz., on the Guerlain website. It is currently on sale at FragranceNet and Jomashop.
Brotherly Love – Jalen Brunson – Believing in Your Greatness
Photography Credit – Brooks Brothers
Apologies. It took me a while to muster the strength to write this post. Nonetheless, I want to congratulate NBA champion and Finals Most Valuable Player Jalen Brunson for winning his first championship. Flowers are indeed deserved – salute. And even though my hometown team – Detroit Pistons – was bounced in the second round this season, surely both teams will see each other on the court in the near future. That is neither here nor there. Today, you are owed all the praise. To be honest, I have always admired your professional, humble demeanor. Seriously – how can I hate on a brother with a Brooks Brothers endorsement deal? Brunson presents as a class act both off the court and on the court. An alleged undersized point guard who was drafted 33rd overall in the second round by the Dallas Mavericks, Brunson was repeatedly lowballed on contracts and ultimately opted not to sign him despite his burgeoning status as a star.
And so, after 8 years in the league, 4 years removed from the Mavericks, and now with the New York Knicks, he put the team on his back to secure the team’s first championship since 1973. Salute. I can’t hate on that at all. Brunson displays a tireless work ethic, incredible resilience, and unwavering mental toughness. He sprinted toward greatness and never shrank from the moment. And winning a championship with your father as an assistant coach on the team? Chef’s kiss. Pure cinema was the outcome. I watch the old clips of Daddy Brunson coaching up Jalen when he was a young kid. I watch them with my own son. The videos are truly inspirational. So, yes, salute to my brother. Wish you nothing more than all the success you deserve – unless you are facing the Pistons on the court!
Style & Substance – Lake House 3-Eye Lug Boat Shoe – Timberland
A few years ago, my family and I traveled to Northern Michigan for a quick weekend getaway. A college friend owns a quaint cabin on a lake that she rents during the spring and summer. And so, we booked some time for the great escape. It was timely, as our metropolitan area was hit by heavy thunderstorms. Subsequently, we lost power at home through that weekend (a lot of discarded food upon our return). Quietly located off the beaten path, the cabin’s rural surroundings, for the most part, do not boast paved walkways that are forgiving on your feet. To navigate the local area, proper footwear was definitely required to traverse the rocky, uneven terrain.
Now, for these circumstances, I prefer to employ footwear that captures a hybrid aesthetic of casual and ever so slightly dressy. I need a shoe that looks good, is comfortable, and is durable. Timberland offers such options in the form of their lug-soled boat shoes. The handsome upper is a sophisticated interpretation of a traditional boat shoe, equipped with a thick rubber lug outsole to handle gently rugged outdoor activities. This is not a traditional “boat shoe”, so practice caution if walking on wet surfaces. I do not like being too close to large bodies of water, so I was safe in that respect.
The marriage of refinement and ruggedness is designed for the gentleman who desires a functional, stylish presentation for indoors and outdoors. I lean into this style of footwear because it departs from the standard sneaker options. It smartly elevates a casual environment without being annoyingly loud. Yet it offers enough fashionable detail to distinguish itself from the crowd. And as an added bonus, the chunky lug outsole provides just a little extra height to my stature. Vanity. Yes, I know. We all have some hang-ups, right?
I have always been a fan of the Timberland brand. I have found them durable and relatively inexpensive, as discounts can be secured year-round with a bit of shopping patience. And if not Timberland, other reputable brands on the market offer a variety of options that check the necessary boxes of masculine appeal, comfort, long-wearing, and class. I highly recommend this style for spring and summer during casual moments that call for relaxed chinos and perhaps a classic polo top.
Product Details
- Upper made with Premium Timberland® Leather
- 3/4-length leather-lined footbed
- 360° functional lacing system
- Leather lining
- Traditional handsewn construction
- Rubber lug outsole
- Imported
- Cost – $170 – currently on sale for Father’s Day
Style & Substance – Vanilla + Cedar Beard Butter – Every Man Jack
Cliche, yes, but Christmas gifts for fathers generally arrive with an array of curiously patterned neckties, the manliest of power tools, and an adorable assortment of socks. Well, this past Christmas, my children broke from that time-honored tradition and decided upon the gift of grooming. And what hid beneath colored tissue paper in my holiday gift bag was a jar of Every Man Jack Vanilla + Cedar Beard Butter. The beard butter is a leave-in conditioner marketed for its promise to tame flyaway hairs, soften your beard, and moisturize your skin. I have spent time with this product for some months now. So, I wanted to share my overall thoughts and experience, and the reader can decide whether it is worth the investment.
- Straight away, I must recognize the product’s pleasant fragrance profile. Product application will obviously land in close proximity to one’s nostrils, so the scent cannot be unnecessarily cloying. Infused with a mellow sweetness, the subtle hints of vanilla do not betray the masculine marketing and presentation. Now, while the warm vanilla is prominent, I do not pick up any obvious traces of cedar. So, if you are a gentleman who prefers woodsy fragrances, this may not be as earthy as advertised to the public.
- Bolstered by shea butter, cocoa butter, coconut oil, and glycerin, the beard butter has a creamy texture that softens both skin and hair. My beard can quickly dry out and flake. It is important that I keep my face moisturized. Every Man Jack Beard Butter leaves my skin supple and my beard fluffy. Do not be alarmed if your beard appears slightly white after massaging a dime-sized amount into your facial hair. It takes a few minutes to be fully absorbed. A quick glance in the mirror, and you will think you have aged a full decade. Do not fear, the appearance is temporary.
- Now, the wheat protein in the ingredients holds the promise to tame disorderly hair strands. My beard is of medium length; I can confidently say this beard butter keeps my beard neat and tidy. However, it is a lightweight product, so thicker beards may require a product with more robust holding power.
- Every Man Jack Vanilla + Cedar Beard Butter is best suited for the gentleman with a short to medium-length beard who prefers a pleasant, unintrusive scented beard conditioner to maintain a neat appearance without breaking the bank. I have tried other beard conditioners, and some are too watery with no scent at all. This product feels like it is working – if that makes sense. This beard conditioner offers excellent entry-level value for the average gentleman.
- Every Man Jack Vanilla + Cedar Beard Butter retails for approximately $12.00 at 4.0 oz. (114g), and available at Amazon, Target, Walmart, and Every Man Jack website.
- Ingredients: Water/ Eau, Cetyl Alcohol, Stearyl Alcohol, Butyrospermum Parkii (Shea) Butter, Caprylic/Capric Triglyceride, Glycerin, Theobroma Cacao (Cocoa) Seed Butter, Cocos Nucifera (Coconut) Oil, Panthenol, Hydrolyzed Wheat Protein, Eugenia Caryophyllus (Clove) Leaf Oil, Tocopheryl Acetate, Cetyl Esters, Glyceryl Dilaurate, Cetearyl Alcohol, Glyceryl Stearate Citrate, Cetrimonium Chloride, Dehydroacetic Acid, Benzyl Alcohol, Citric Acid, Sodium Lauroyl Glutamate, Glyceryl Caprylate, Fragrance/ Parfum, Alpha-Isomethyl Ionone, Hydroxycitronellal
Daddy Diary – If You Play Your (Basketball) Cards Right, Everything Will Be Alright – The Life & Times of Raising a Young Boy
Unsurprisingly, I am wholly confident that my current challenges of rearing a young boy is not exclusive to my parental timeline. If you are an involved father, and your rambunctious offspring is prone to boneheaded, impulsive behavior – well – you understand the struggle is agonizingly real. Trust, the anxiety induced when one receives an e-mail or phone call from the school is steeped with other worldly levels of stress. Moreover, subsequent frustration is heightened due to how wildly dissimilar our personalities seemingly appear from my perspective. I am extremely quiet and reserved. My son, not so much. And so, perhaps as many other parents such as myself, I searched for activities that would constructively redirect his energy, sharpen his focus while instilling discipline, and awarding him a few victories along the way for his hard work.
Two years ago, I identified an opportunity. Now, I am an avid basketball fan, and with the NBA season approaching, I decided to resurrect a hobby that I enjoyed as a child with my boy – sports card collecting. I absolutely loved ripping open packs and collecting my favorite players. Back then, it was not the corporate business it is now, with specialty cards pricing out the average collector – especially if that collector is just a kid. I had two binders: one blue and the other brown. I had some great rookie cards that I cherished: Grant Hill, Chris Webber, and Dikembe Mutombo just to name a few. Through years of a few changes in residence, my binders were unfortunately lost. It is my hope that they will be rediscovered in a miscellaneous box one day. I digress; I hoped basketball would be the activity to get my son together.
Now, along with collecting basketball cards, I sought an opportunity to introduce a sport (basketball) that could capture and channel his energy for the court – definitely not the classroom. Basketball themed birthday cakes, a portable hoop in the backyard, designated basketball sneakers, basketball camps, and the aforementioned trading cards were all a part of the master plan to course correct my son. The years (yes, years) had been rough. Sometimes, it felt that all the emotional and mental support I expended did not yield any positive returns. It was painfully exhausting, mind-numbingly aggravating, and many times saddening. Doubting myself as a father was not uncommon. Humbly, as a gentleman that generally dispenses what I believe is wise counsel, my words were not landing with my boy. What was I doing wrong?
For the multitude of advice books on the market, fatherhood truly does not have an instructional manual that addresses every scenario. It is very much trial and error – sometimes heavy on the error. I have regrets, many situations I wished I handled differently. Nevertheless, we are dutifully staying the course, and the tide has shifted in a positive direction. Corrective conversations with teachers, principals, and assistant principals have ceased – knock on wood. Test scores are up. He is getting along better with his peers. Punishments have been replaced with praise. Sure, there are the occasional youthful hiccups that accompany this maturation process. That is to be expected, and we are in a much better space now.
So, as father & on making this journey together against the backdrop of basketball, I am proud of his growth. Sometimes, I use current events from the basketball world to teach lessons about life. Nevertheless, it is not all so serious. Along with youth basketball league, watching NBA games together on the couch, we have secured some serious, prime rookie cards from this generation’s NBA stars. Anthony Edwards, Victor Wembanyama, Cade Cunningham, and Shai Gilgeous-Alexander are just a few that we have collected. We have definitely bonded, as I am attempting to create a relationship that I did not enjoy as a child. Raising him has highlighted the importance of preparing him for this crazy world around us. So, if you are a father in the struggle, hang in there. Even when you’re getting your ankles broken on the court (I’ll save that for another post), and you come face to face with Father Time, just know that your value to your child is indeed invaluable.
Living Your Best Life – Assistance
Style & Substance – Florsheim x Duckie Brown – Classic Penny Loafer
As time passes, it is difficult to reconcile how long I have been writing here at The Gentleman’s Standard. The loafers pictured above were purchased around the year 2009, and my style evolution was still in its early phase. I was branching out beyond my sartorial comfort zone, as I experimented with color, fabric, and new fashionable additions to my wardrobe. For example, my shoe game ranged from standard dress oxfords to thick-soled boots, but that was the extent of my modest footwear collection. During that period, I began to explore a variety of footwear options – penny loafers being the first incorporated into my rotation.
The Florsheim x Duckie Brown joint venture presented a prime opportunity to try something new. The soft suede is infused with a gentle rose hue that offers an unexpected, if not lively jolt to my presentation. It is not every day that you see a gentleman with dusty pink wheels peeking from underneath stone-colored khakis. Crazy to think these shoes are that old. They are perfect for spring and summer, as they lend an updated vibe to a vintage, classic look.
Nearly 17 years ago, you would have been hard-pressed to catch me rocking loafers, especially in a soft tone like pink. Nevertheless, I embraced the clean, sophisticated approach – and the inner confidence to sport this look in public. Trust, people noticed, and the compliments were never in short supply. Keep it stylish gentlemen.
Living Your Best Life – Guided by Purpose
To be certain, life is sometimes an uneven journey of complex experiences tenuously chained together. Given that fact, a gentleman carefully navigates his life with a purpose that governs his actions. He will thoughtfully afford the requisite time and due diligence to satisfy that purpose. Admirable as that is, however, a gentleman may err by overthinking the subject. True, a gentleman must live life with meaning and reason. Nevertheless, purpose should not be defined as some cosmic, life-altering motive for existing. A gentleman can risk searching for a purpose so profound that it inadvertently paralyzes his ability to bring meaningful value to this shared experience of life.
Certainly, having a big purpose has its place. However, sometimes, simple is best. Sometimes, a man just needs an objective – challenging, yet attainable without depleting emotional, mental, or physical inventory. It is tentatively spring here in Michigan, so my simple purpose is to tend to my yard. My hostas, salvia, bee balm, and lilies (although a rabbit snacked on one) are all springing from the ground in all their botanical glory. Purpose sometimes has a season in a gentleman’s life.
Now is the season when my garden plays a huge role in my day-to-day living. My primary job is to keep the garden thriving and vibing. Just take a look at my creeping phlox pictured above. I planted this ground cover approximately 2 years ago with the hopes of adding color and choking out nearby weeds. They were scrawny in the beginning, but some dutiful TLC has resulted in a beautiful floral display near the edges of my garden bed. Challenge: Add some purpose to your life that grants a feeling of accomplishment and fulfillment. It does not need to be world-changing, but it should make you swell with pride and a sense of valuable intention.
All the Smoke – Replica by the Fireplace – A Smoldering, Signature Scent That Sizzles in the Spring
As a gentleman of a certain age, I have discovered that my scent palate has slowly evolved to reflect more mature sensibilities. And those mature sensibilities dictate a measured, easy-going approach to living life. Now, life is undoubtedly, sometimes exceedingly complicated. Therefore, when the inevitable intrusion of stress introduces itself into my everyday affairs, I employ grounding techniques that bring me back to center. Grounding is a coping strategy utilized to calm one’s mental health and well-being when under duress.
Grounding refocuses and reconnects you to the present moment; its purpose is to reduce anxiety, fear, stress, and feelings of being overwhelmed. I ground myself by dutifully engaging my senses: touch, sight, hearing, taste, and for the purposes of this post, smell. I wholly enjoy the aromatic nuances of a great-smelling cologne. When perfectly executed, its notes carry me to a safe, soothing space within my mind. I smell great, I feel great. Today, I wanted to talk about one of my favorites – By the Fireplace.
- Maison Margiela Replica-By the Fireplace is a 2015 release created by perfumer Marie Salamagne. The Replica line is a collection of fragrances designed to replicate intimate memories from specific moments, places, and feelings from a person’s life. The Replica line offers an array of fragrances that range from strolls on the beach to vibing in a jazz club to relaxing by a toasty fireplace.
- Curiously marketed as a unisex scent, I would humbly disagree with that assessment regarding By the Fireplace. Definitely true to its moniker, the surprisingly realistic aroma of charred wood is both strong and masculine. The warm, sweetly smoky fragrance offers an elegant interpretation of a rustic vibe, evoking the cozy vibe of cuddling by a crackling fireplace. Yes, this is cuddle-buddy approved. It’s warm, deep, and slightly sweet.
- Top notes: pink pepper essence, orange flower absolute, and clove oil. Middle notes: chestnut accord, guaiac wood oil, and cade oil. Base notes: vanilla accord, cashmeran, and Peru balsam.
- Did You Know? Studies show that vanilla has been associated with to elevating a person’s mood, relaxation, and reducing negative emotions.
- With this easily distinctive cologne, a gentleman can safely apply 3-4 sprays without tripping a nearby smoke detector. A gentleman should get a solid 6-7 hours of performance, and perhaps even longer, depending on individual body chemistry. It projects reasonably well, but it won’t choke out an entire room of people.
- However, I would not consider this smoldering scent appropriate for the office, as the smoky notes of chestnuts and guaiac wood may not be pleasing to everyone. Surely, a considerate gentleman is mindful of other people’s sensibilities. Warning: The delicate line between smelling like a cozy, warm fire and a burning inferno can be turned on its head by over-spraying. To be sure, this fragrance is meant to be enjoyed within close quarters of that special someone. It’s intimate. It’s cozy. It’s inviting.
- By the Fireplace is formulated for the slightly weathered, sophisticated gentleman who is self-assured and unapologetic in his masculinity. It is a casual fragrance best suited for evening wear. When I think of this cologne, my mind envisions silk/cashmere sweaters coupled with soft cotton trousers and slick loafers.
- By the Fireplace is a cologne built for cooler temperatures, preferably fall and winter, but during this sneaky season of “false spring”, surprise drops in temperature could provide a prime opportunity for wearing. However, as soon as those temperatures hit 70 and higher, By the Fireplace can quickly become a little cloying to the nose.
- Maison Margiela Replica-By the Fireplace retails for $170.00 3.4 oz. and $89.00 1.05 oz. By the Fireplace is available at Maison Margiela, Macy’s, Sephora, and other fine men’s department stores. If a gentleman is savvy enough to stay informed regarding sales, FragranceNet.com may also be a viable option to procure this scent at a steep discount.
Living Your Best Life
Living Your Best Life – Appreciating the Little Things
Certainly, life can be an extended marathon complete with unexpected turns, dizzying highs, and deflating lows. Worn and weathered by the challenging journey, a gentleman must seek refuge within the shelter of self-care and wellness. A gentleman must identify and recognize the small things that bring joy and fulfillment to this existence. Because, albeit unbeknownst to him, it can be the little things that bring forth the most meaning and contentment. And trust, the return on investing in one’s own happiness is immensely invaluable. I will provide the reader a simple example. This week, I journeyed to Michaels to purchase assorted Valentine’s merchandise for my son’s classroom celebration of Cupid’s favorite day of the year.
It was no surprise that items were already on sale. To be sure, stores move swiftly between holidays to deplete old inventory to accommodate incoming merchandise – hello St. Patrick’s Day and Easter. Nevertheless, as it is still frustratingly frigid outside, it was only appropriate that Christmas items were still stocked throughout the store – of course on a very steep discount. With a discount to the tune of 70%, I briefly abandoned my mission of love to dive into some big, beautiful bargain bins, hoping to spy something unique to add to my gift-wrapping war chest. Now, if you have been following this blog, you know that I have become quite fond of wrapping gifts. Perusing the gift tags, ribbon, and wrapping paper; I spotted a container of lively jingle bells.
And so, for a mere $1.50, I was able to procure a 9-piece set of assorted, colorful bells to add to the collection of Christmas complements. Looking at the vivid bells through the clear plastic container, my mind began to race through creative ideas for Christmas 2026. The smile inside me was unapologetically broad. The time I will spend pairing and threading colored twine through bells as I wrap a fanciful bow is reserved strictly for my peace of mind. It is reserved for my creative impulses. It is reserved for the joy and satisfaction I feel when look at the finished work, selfishly not wanting it to ever be untied. Joy. Peace. Fulfillment. All for the low, low price of $1.50 and a bit of quiet time to myself. What are the little things that bring you happiness? What the small things that afford you peace and satisfaction? You are worth investing in you. Stayed tuned for Christmas 2026. Too soon?
Style & Substance – Standing on Business (Casual) – An Unabashed Endorsement for the Hybrid Dress Shoe
Approximately one month ago or so, my YouTube algorithm recommended a video that highlighted three men’s styles that should have been unabashedly abandoned in the year 2025. To my astonishment, the hybrid dress shoe was unceremoniously identified for such cancellation. And I wholeheartedly understand, the marriage of formal and informal shoe aesthetics can succeed stylishly, or lead to a Frankenstein furnishing of fashion.
More than a decade ago, the rise of the hybrid dress shoe arrived with some unsightly offerings. The inelegant execution of a refined dress shoe upper and cushioned sneaker outsole resulted in a clunky, unbalanced piece of footwear. Nevertheless, as with any experimental creation, trial and error is required to steadily improve the final product. I believe more and more brands are nailing the execution. Therefore, don’t reserve those dress hybrids to the trash bin so soon.
In my humble opinion, the dress shoe hybrid offers a useful combination of utility and practicality. They bridge the divide between business formal and casual. Now, the office dress code at my job prohibits wearing sneakers unless approved for medical reasons. And for a gentleman such as myself who prefers to break up cubicle monotony with a walk around the office floor, a traditional dress shoe can be quite unforgiving on one’s feet. Heaven forbid a colleague utilizes a standup desk. The soft midsole and outsole can help ease potential aching feet.
Comfort also extends to long commutes across parking lots or if you are standing for an extended period of time (perhaps a PowerPoint presentation on tap). The versatility of a hybrid allows for an appealing appearance of an Oxford while ensuring the walking comfort and cushioning of a sneaker. And yes, loafers can fit the bill as well. Our office allows for business casual attire, so the dress hybrid is perfect compromise. And added bonuses such as improved traction and better durability about the sole make it even more practical.
Now, as much as I am a strong advocate for hybrid dress shoes, I do abide by a principled set of personal rules and protocols. I do not wear hybrid shoes with suits or dress trousers. I understand that some personalities in media wear dress hybrids with suits, but the presentation looks a bit uneven and odd from my perspective. Denim jeans or cotton pants would be my preferred bottoms of choice. Uppers should still retain the presence of quality leather, so the shoe does not project a cheap aura. So, where should a gentleman begin to look for a distinguished dress hybrid?
Whether wingtip, cap-toe, plain toe, tassel loafer, etc., I have a few brand recommendations. Cole Haan, Magnanni, Johnston & Murphy, and Grenson are reputable brands I have found success throughout the years. Johnston & Murphy are the most affordable ($100-150) with sales seemingly always ongoing. Style can be hit or miss, as J&M sometimes leans heavily into the sneaker aesthetic on some models. The more casual the shoe becomes; you are probably better off just buying a full-fledged sneaker.
Magnanni and Grenson offer the most style but are expensive (we’re talking North of $400 dollars here), so look for sales when you can spot a few. Cole Haan offers comfort and affordability ($100-150) with continuing sales on par with J&M. Cole Haan tends to be more aesthetically pleasing than J&M with a variety of dazzling colors for selection. On par with Cole Haan, Grenson also offers great comfort. However, their wedge soles tend to be thicker, so select wisely to match your own style. Personally, I do not mind a few centimeters added to my height!
I think it is a tad bit premature to announce the demise of the hybrid dress shoe. As office dress codes have relaxed over the years, a hybrid shoe can provide a gentleman a service of form and function. A gentleman is afforded a polished, professional presentation while reducing the possibility of aching feet. A few pairs in the gentleman’s closet would most definitely elevate his business casual attire up a few notches.
The Gentlemen's Standard 