Tag Archives: Leadership

The Professional – All That Yakety Yak – How to Handle a Talkative Colleague

June 27, 2025 By in Professional Tags: , , , , , , Leave a comment
Photo by Andrew Neel on Pexels.com

You simply are not allowed to speak your peace or offer insight. In vain, you attempt to conjure the right words, but you are cut off or talked over. Sometimes, the other person is just talking a mile per minute. From time to time, you may encounter a belligerent colleague that just will not allow you to get a word in edgewise. You may also encounter a verbose colleague that monopolizes all of the oxygen in the room. The atmosphere may be tense, and they are determined to drive their point. You may feel frustration or exasperation. If you experience either scenario, please feel free to use the following sentences: You have to give me the opportunity to speak. If we are going to have a constructive conversation, and have a meaningful exchange of opinion or ideas, I must have the opportunity to add to the dialogue.

Now, everyone’s situation is going to vary, so I would humbly suggest you take my recommended verbiage and tailor it to fit your own specific circumstances. Your delivery should be calm, reserved, and definitely firm. Your tone should be serious. It should be worth noting that you may need to reiterate your point a few times. Some individuals will attempt to argue you into the ground. You must remain married to your talking points and not stray off course. And if you still cannot get a word in – terminate the conversation. There is no need to talk in meaningless circles. Your parting word should be your last word. And your parting word should look like the following: When you are prepared to have a substantive discussion, and I am an active participant, we can certainly reconvene the conversation. Have a nice day.

The Professional – Shut Em Down – Prevent Your Next Team Meeting from Becoming a Workplace Battle Royale

June 25, 2025 By in Professional Tags: , , , , , , , , Leave a comment
Photo by Daan Stevens on Pexels.com

When a team meeting begins an unexpected downward spiral into chaos and negativity, as a leader in management, one must never hesitate to utilize one’s authority to shut it down – immediately. And as a leader with direct reports, managing a medley of personalities can be quite challenging. Naturally employees will have team disagreements; that is to be expected as no two individuals are exactly alike. However, when difference of opinion devolves into disruption and disrespect, the resulting disorder can adversely affect team productivity and morale. Being a leader, one must have the foresight to identify potential conflict and strategically diffuse the situation before it escalates. The power of foresight can only be attained through hardened experience; there is no course or training that will prepare you for the variables of human behavior. I have endured through trial and error. I want to share some of my insight with you. Here are a few warning signs that your meeting may fly off the rails.

  • First of all, well, your silent alarm should be blaring when a colleague starts their sentence with “first of all”. Said colleague is about to launch into a lengthy diatribe complete with examples and key grievances – bullet point by bullet point.
  • A leader must be cognizant of inflammatory language and trigger expressions. When a colleague starts using accusatory language with a belittling tone, the recipient of the incoming fire will become defensive and will most likely reciprocate the sentiment. You never, you always, you should, or why don’t you are leading subjects generally delivered in a chastising manner. Calling attention to another colleague’s faults and errors, either aggressively or passive aggressively, is extremely toxic to the work environment. When a colleague’s work ethic or performance is being critiqued in full view of the entire team – by a non-leader – it will not be received kindly.
  • Everyone makes mistakes. Be leery of the colleague that chastises fellow employees while presenting themselves as the paragon of work perfection. And this self-appreciation is usually contrasted with a fellow employee as described in the previous bullet point.
  • When colleagues constantly interrupt one another and talk over each other, they are effectively ineffective with their listening comprehension.
  • A leader must also be aware of body language. The folded arms, the scowl, the pursed lips, the heavy sighs, the eye rolls, and I could go on and on.

So, as a combustible cauldron of chaos is being stirred with hostile intent, it is your duty to quell any disorder before it explodes into professional bedlam. What we do not want is a Lord of the Flies scenario in the workplace. So, what do you do? First, you must be calm and measured. You must be the voice of reason and pragmatism. Sensing potential conflict, you must insert yourself between quarreling colleagues to prevent them from launching verbal missiles at each other. Your voice must be the most dominant in the room. And dominant does not mean yelling. It should be firm, resolute, and steady. Table the discussion and direct the team that any unresolved issues will be taken offline. You should assert that bickering does not add value and is not constructive usage of everyone’s time. And when all else fails, remember as a leader in management, you can leverage the power of corrective action. Correction actions can be a pain to implement, but allowing discord to fester can quickly disrupt team dynamics. Shut it down as soon as the opportunity presents itself.

The Professional – Just for the Record – Why Documentation is Required Practice When Managing People

December 29, 2023 By in Professional Tags: , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

wp-1703802505364293885935194685955If I may offer some gentle advice to any new manager or supervisor: document, document, and document. And if you are a veteran leader in people management, but have mistakenly failed to perform this required practice, well, it would behoove you to document, document, and document some more immediately. Trust, an otherwise quaint work environment can become as brutal as Game of Thrones at the drop of a dime. The emergence of deceit, politics, jealously, power struggle, manipulation, and outright hate would make Cersei Lannister a proud, blushing queen. Managing a wide array of unique personalities, you can trust that at some point a colleague is going to come at you sideways. And in the event when that occurs, it is paramount that you are appropriately armed with receipts. I am speaking about recorded documentation of events and conversations that can confidently address any allegation, accusation, denial, work violation, so on and so forth.

A comprehension record of critical incidents at work is vital, especially if human resources need to be involved in a delicate situation. Let me be perfectly clear, documenting either issues with productivity or behavior should not be utilized with the intent to terminate any employee. Rather, the purpose documentation is to articulate a clear timeline of events, set clear expectations of job performance, and ensure that everyone has the same knowledge of company policies, procedures, changes, upcoming events, etc. It is all about communication with the colleague. Unfortunately, it is also to protect yourself in case a colleague decides to go full Petyr Baelish (Littlefinger) on you – manipulating both facts and people to bring about your downfall. Nope, you have to go full Sansa Stark and start running those receipts until they have no room to wiggle out of their deceit and treachery. Alright, enough Game of Thrones callbacks, here are a few reasons why it is important to keep detailed notes when in the role of management.

  • E-mail timestamps are a beautiful thing to behold. It captures the date, time, and any recipients that have received the electronic transmission of important information. This electronic signature can be invaluable when someone attempts to muddy a timeline of events or outright deny something occurred. And to take it up a notch, configure the e-mail to request a Read Receipt, which notifies you when your e-mail has been delivered and opened by the receiver. Save that Read Receipt if ever a dispute arises with anyone revising history.
  • If you are communicating directly with a subordinate, and the conversation begs for a second set of eyes, blind copy your immediate leadership so they are aware of any worthy communication that should be captured. You never want your boss to be blindsided by a situation if a colleague decides to go rouge and torch the entire department. Your boss does not necessarily need to act on the matter. This exercise is merely a courtesy heads-up for awareness.
  • The work environment can be hectic with an ever-changing landscape of policy and protocol. Therefore, if you find yourself leading a team huddle or meeting, it would be wise to assign the task of taking minutes to a colleague so it can be distributed via e-mail (there’s that timestamp again). This is a step to make sure everyone is on the same page. However, you will STILL have that one employee that will deny they were told anything. Luckily for you, those minutes are a timestamped record that they were duly informed. And if not taking minutes, jot down a brief summary of the team discussion and e-mail accordingly.
  • You would be performing a great service to yourself, because even if you don’t have it committed to memory, understanding the company’s mission and vision should help guide your management style as a leader. Copy and paste that company doctrine and slap it on a desktop sticky note. What does that have to do with document, document, and document? Because, if the situation ever calls for corrective action (either verbal or written), you should be armed with HR policy and procedures at the ready to deliver to an employee. Used in tandem with the knowledge of the mission and vision, you should be able to confidently deliver any appropriate corrective action with the company’s own language in black and white. And by the way, even “verbal” corrective actions should be documented.
  • On the topic of corrective action, omit any personal feelings or opinion on the employee matter. Rather, speak specifically to either employee behavior or productivity in regard to how they are not aligned with the company policy or protocol. Focus on areas of opportunity for improvement. In regard to either behavior or productivity, there should not be any surprises, as a manager should keep the employee informed of both. A detailed capture of any check-ins/reviews should be provided to the employee.
  • Does your company utilize a messaging software platform such as Microsoft 365 Teams? If so, well yes, those communications should be captured and filed away in another application such as Microsoft 365 OneNote. If that is not available, you can go the old-school route and file it away in a desktop folder. And you can be extra cautious by printing out any communications and filing it away in a physical folder – in a secure location of course. Whatever internal messaging platform your company is using; this can be an excellent way to document any important information that should be noted.
  • Every situation will not need an immediate corrective action. However, it is important to take notes that detail an ongoing situation. Email those notes to yourself so that the date of the occurrence is recorded and timestamped. If you find yourself in a tense situation with a colleague, state that the present behavior does not align with company or department policy, indicate you will be discussing the situation with upper management, and if further action is required you will be in contact. And then kindly excuse yourself from the interaction. Immediately record the event while still fresh in your memory but give yourself time to cool off if you are rattled or out of sorts emotionally. It is tough, but remember, you simply need to record the occurrence and utilize company/department policy to support your recommendation (if any) for corrective measures.

The Standard #3

November 18, 2023 By in Standard Tags: , , , Leave a comment

Mountain

The knowledgeable gentleman comprehends that his image does not begin with how society views him. Rather, the gentleman’s image begins with how he sees himself. He alone determines and dictates the manner in which he is presented to the world. When he gazes into the mirror, the reflection of greatness should readily greet him. It does not begin with the clothing he chooses to attire himself in, nor the vehicle he selects to navigate city streets. Not the place of employment where he makes a living. Not the amount of money presently residing in his bank account. Why? Well, because character starts with his self-worth. His esteem is not erected upon a mountain of biodegradable materialism – subject to decay and waste. No, the gentleman’s image is based on gentlemanly fundamentals that are concrete and certain. Virtue. Honor. Principle. Forthrightness. The Gentlemen’s Standard.

The Standard #45

April 25, 2023 By in Standard Tags: , , , , Leave a comment

Mountain

A wise gentleman understands that his reward and blessings in life are not entirely his own to selfishly possess. Rather, his reward and blessings are meant to fuel his purpose, and his purpose – in some form or another – should be enhancing and adding value to the lives of other people. To be sure, a gentleman’s objective in life should not be driven by a concerted focus to facilitate personal gain, especially at the costly expense of other individuals. The wise and prosperous gentleman understands that material wealth is meaningless if it is not utilized to cultivate prosperity with other members in society.

A gentleman’s service may arrive in the form of monetary value, educational and knowledge sharing, or granting valuable time with his presence. Truly, however, whatever a gentleman gives of himself to bless the life of another person is wholly his own decision. Surely the accomplished gentleman understands that his own blessings are most likely have been assisted by a helping hand – seen or unforeseen. Today, identify and recognize your own blessings and how they can positively impact the life of someone who could really reap the benefits. Someone is in need right now.

The Standard #56

November 9, 2020 By in Standard Tags: , , , , , Leave a comment

To be absolutely clear, representation is vitally important to a population of people conditioned to marginalization and abandonment. Trust, one must not underestimate the weighty emotional and psychological impact that representation achieves. The visual affirmation symbolizes the audacity of possibility; it molds and breathes life into unbounded imagination. The reflection of greatness can sow seeds of future greatness. And as pride fills long neglected spaces belonging to confidence and self-esteem; the resulting inspiration fuels the desire to want and become more – more than the forsaken environment that continually threatens to suppress and suffocate the life of aspirational dreams. Symbols matter. Role models matter. Representation matters. And so I state to you, no matter how big or small, it is incumbent that you be what the youth need to see. Your life, your testimony can unbind restraints that shackle the potential success and achievement.

 

Standard #29

November 1, 2020 By in Standard Tags: , , , , , Leave a comment

Humility. The act of possessing a modest opinion of one’s importance, understanding the complex context of life, and respecting the reality that other individuals may be better at some things than you. Gentlemen, please don’t be misled by the boisterous musings of silly folk; so enamored by their own greatness that they cannot recognize their own shortcomings. Sometimes a man must recognize his faults and limitations. There is no shame in that. One must understand that embracing humility does not make a gentleman weak – actually, humility strengthens you. It keeps you grounded. It keeps you focused – on the important things in life.

It is brazen arrogance that renders a gentleman vulnerable. Trust this: Keep living and life will eventually happen to you. And life can be the greatest administrator of humility. Recognize your position in life, and even if your station ranks well above others, discipline yourself in humility, as the folly of vanity can ultimately become your undoing. You don’t want to discover this bit of wisdom the hard way, but I am sure that you won’t. Maintain the standard my friends; catch you later.

Black Thought

October 28, 2020 By in Black Thought Tags: , , , , , 2 Comments

“We cannot have perfection. We have few saints. But we must have honest men or we die. We must have unselfish, far-seeing leadership or we fail.”

– W.E.B. DuBois

These words were spoken so many decades ago. Nevertheless, these wise words ring with an unmistakable truth and resounding clarity today. Because, unfortunately in these turbulent times, the scarcity of leadership is at once hopelessly disappointing and terribly frightening. At its core, leadership demands honest, decisive action in the service and best interests of a people. The naked, bombastic machismo we witness today – delivered with unflinching dishonest selfishness – fosters a maddening, toxic environment with aimless direction. Today, we stand shakily on the precipice of outright moral anarchy. To be sure, the fallibility of man is an unavoidable consequence of being human. No one can escape being marked with some form of moral blemish. Nevertheless, conscientious ignorance emboldened with manipulative deceit is an enthusiastic embrace of corruption. Leadership begs transparent forthrightness based upon principles and honesty. A leader comprehends and differentiates between right and wrong. His actions are guided by truth, justice, integrity, empathy, and humility. A leader empowers others. A leader communicates clearly and directly. A leader practices gratitude. Certainly we need more leaders today. Time to step up.

The Standard #55

September 11, 2020 By in Standard Tags: , , , , , , , Leave a comment

The current national climate of uncertainty has undoubtedly reinforced an absolute certainty; power openly divulges intimate details of an individual’s character through a stark magnification of personal attributes. Power is influence and authority. Power absent good ethics and accountability will most certainly lead to unfortunate, perhaps even dangerous consequences. Furnished with said power; how does a man commence to abuse it? The answer begs an exploration of a man’s origins. What becomes of a child not reared to become a man?

Skillfully schooled to subjugate with a superficial sense of superiority and supremacy; relieved of responsibility and rectitude. Insulated from individual ineptitude and inadequacy; absolved of arrogance and amorality. Deprived of necessary growth and development opportunities, this child physically matures as an adult but lacks the emotional and mental intelligence to function as one. It is the making of mock manhood molded in magnificent mediocrity and manufactured masculinity. What becomes of a child not reared to become a man, yet now is imbued with power?

What stands is a man that abdicates any modicum of morality, decency, responsibility, and empathy. He consistently constructs imaginary slights as motivation to humiliate and demean individuals. He accumulates and consolidates power for selfish benefit and gain. Yet shrouded beneath a flimsy veneer of authority is a gross overestimation of ability and overcompensation of might to mask his own deficiencies. Isolated within a self-imposed power vacuum, he gradually suffocates from the lack of respect, love, and confidence. Thrashing about, starved of those key human necessities, he hurts people either directly or indirectly.

And so I say to the audience, to those of us still grounded with integrity, righteousness and dignity: We must use our platform, our voice, our power to speak against such dangers to society. Such naked displays of corrupt power must be fervently opposed and defeated –  for our collective humanity demands it. It cries out for it. Corrupt power cannot be rewarded with indifference or silence because that is tantamount to complicity. Do not be complicit in your society’s demise. I implore you to embrace the mantle of righteous leadership in a time where there are far too many voids. Righteous leadership begs the ability to appeal to the intelligence, emotion and resolve of people – absent manipulative agitation and fear. So, what becomes of a child properly reared through adolescence to adulthood? Hopefully, they become the person I am speaking to now. Rise up!

The Professional – The Coronavirus Chronicles: 5 Ways to Keep a Team Motivated & Engaged While Working From Home

May 1, 2020 By in Professional Tags: , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

To be absolutely certain, SARS-CoV-2 has altered and disrupted contemporary life as we know it. Our daily routines have been cast into disarray; so we steel ourselves daily with the resolve and steadfastness to answer different challenges we all face. As I stated in my previous post, working remotely from home is not as glamorous as it may appear to the public. Trust, those of us that can work remotely are blessed. However, there are some challenges that cannot be ignored. Locked down utilizing whatever space is available to conduct work efficiently and effectively can be challenging. For example, my role and responsibilities require a consistent carousel of interaction with suppliers, hospital personnel, sales representatives, executive leadership, and fellow colleagues. These tasks are not an issue within the comforting confines of a cubicle or meeting room. Now, at home – not so much. Without a doubt, the concept of work-life balance has been disrupted. Coupled with the elimination of in-person team collaboration and the specter of furlough or termination; the combined stress can deplete what little remains of a worker’s drive and enthusiasm. As leaders, how can we keep a team motivated and engaged when the energy just isn’t there given the current environment? I am not an expert, but I offer 5 tips below that might be helpful.

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Licensed to Ill…Behavior – A Simple Request For a Return to Decency, Manners, & Common Sense

December 16, 2019 By in Standard Tags: , , , , , Leave a comment

The knowledgeable gentleman comprehends that his image does not begin with how society views him. Rather, the gentleman’s image begins with how he sees himself. He alone determines and dictates the manner in which he is presented to the world. Now, the first few sentences of this post may sound familiar because I penned those words back in 2013 as I was creating my ongoing Standard posts. It amazes me as those words are still true today. Image does matter. Image is sometimes dictated by personal behavior and choices. Now, I wholeheartedly admit that although I identify mostly as a liberal, I still maintain moderate views. That being said, I believe that as a collective, we must champion a standard of self-respect, dignity, and class. This is not sanctimony. This is not respectability politics; it is just plain respectability for oneself. Now, it has been approximately 25 years since I graduated high school, and in just a little over two decades, the cultural shift in principles and decency has been dramatic.

Perhaps it feels dramatic because I am older and this generation’s views regarding manners differ from my own. And perhaps being a father now has aged my way of thinking. However, shouldn’t certain standards be timeless? Can we all agree – using some honest common sense – that all behavior is not created equal? Some conduct is simply ill-mannered and disagreeable. Carrying oneself as a gentleman or as a lady should transcend generations. Yet, some individuals in our more famous population are absolved of any unseemly conduct that a normal person would be roundly criticized. Nevertheless, it feels as if more credence has been afforded some celebrities that don’t represent the best behavior that society has to offer. I fully understand that a celebrity represents a brand not necessarily intended to be a role model. Nonetheless, especially in this day and age, brands are built off a devout following.

Perched upon a pedestal that is supported by unwavering, unbiased devotion; celebrity should not inoculate an individual against a critique of ill behavior. To be sure, power and purpose are pillars of a prominent person’s platform. So there has to be some level of responsibility. Because, when your favorite personality (actor, politician, singer, etc.) is promoting crude behavior, please understand said behavior does not translate seamlessly to every aspect of life. Work. School. Home. There are a lot of impressionable people that emulate what they mistakenly deem as acceptable. Sadly, I feel that my fellow people of color are so angry and determined for representation, they accept the unacceptable and don’t object to the objectionable. So my responsibility as a parent, mentor, and leader is separating fantasy from reality for those that may have challenges discerning between the two. Call me a square, but I would not condone my daughter describing herself as a bad b*tch and showing all her business. Nor would I condone my son sagging his pants and describing himself as a thug n*gga. And this would include any other behavior that would otherwise be considered unbecoming, untoward, unethical, and unnecessary. We have to do better. We have to do better together.

The Standard #48

December 15, 2019 By in Standard Tags: , , , 1 Comment

With absolute certainty, the mantle of leadership demands fidelity to integrity, responsibility, wisdom, and truth. Leadership is an exhausting exercise in guiding others, often thankless, yet undoubtedly needed. It requires a steadfast commitment to exemplifying a righteous standard, a model for all to glean its best virtues. However, do not be mistaken, a person charged with the supervision of others may not necessarily retain the aforementioned leadership prerequisites. Trust, regardless of an individual’s station in life, or designation of a title, everyone is not suited to be a leader. Someone that disseminates disinformation and displays a craven hunger for chaos cannot be considered a true leader. A leader’s actions are dictated not by what is popular, rather, a gentleman’s actions are guided by what is just, reasonable, and logical. In the midst of tumult and tribulation, a leader exudes calm and steadiness. Typified by cohesive communication and unambiguous direction, the servant leader is driven not by emotion. Ideally, he embraces a pragmatic approach based on informed, selfless decision-making in the service of others. He recognizes personal faults; and exhibits a willingness to improve, learn, and mature. His mind is open to differing ideology and thought; always ready to compromise on points that are sensible and rational, as serving others is never lost in his actions.

The Standard #48

December 11, 2018 By in Standard Tags: , , 2 Comments

With absolute certainty, the mantle of leadership demands a fidelity to integrity, responsibility, wisdom, and truth. Leadership is an exhausting exercise in guiding others, often thankless, yet undoubtedly needed. It requires a steadfast commitment to exemplifying a righteous standard, a model for all to glean its best virtues. However, do not be mistaken, a person charged with the supervision of others may not necessarily retain the aforementioned leadership prerequisites. Trust, regardless of an individual’s station in life, or designation of a title, everyone is not suited to be a leader. Someone that disseminates disinformation and displays a craven hunger for chaos cannot be considered a true leader. A leader’s actions are dictated not by what is popular, rather, a gentleman’s actions are guided by what is just, reasonable, and logical. In the midst of tumult and tribulation, a leader exudes calm and steadiness. Typified by cohesive communication and unambiguous direction, the servant leader is driven not by emotion. Ideally, he embraces a pragmatic approach based on informed, selfless decision-making in the service of others. He recognizes personal faults; and exhibits a willingness to improve, learn, and mature. His mind is open to differing ideology and thought; always ready to compromise on points that are sensible and rational, as serving others is never lost in his actions.

The Standard #46

January 21, 2018 By in Standard Tags: , , , 2 Comments

Because, upon discovering himself in the midst of uncertainty and disquiet, the confident gentleman understands that indecision cannot be an absolute decision. This is exactly where I discovered myself, as a supervisor, this month at my place of employment. Over the course of two years, it has been an enlightening, humbling experience wrought with anxiety, stress, and self-doubt. At times, finally feeling a self-assured comfort with my leadership abilities, and other times, arrested by a sense of failure and inadequacy within my profession. However, when confronted with extenuating circumstances on a myriad of fronts, the definitive, resolute decision-making of a leader was required, and I would either excel or succumb to my professional fears. As reason and logic stood in ambiguous contrast with emotion and empathy, only prayer and deep meditation could grant sound thinking and measured action. And in the end, I was the leader that I had difficulty embracing. Sometimes, the Lord allows tribulation to have a season to reveal self-assured abilities, integrity, and character within oneself in the face of debilitating self-doubt. Faith is trusting the Lord even when life’s challenges are perplexing and burdens appear too heavy to bear. You are the leader that you know you are; trust in Him and fortify yourself in His strength.