To be sure, the thoughtful gentleman understands that every moment of significance carries meaning. Moments matter. This is especially true for the gentleman that has embarked upon the journey of fatherhood. Understandably, the journey is an arduous one, replete with important occasions that beg the focused attention and participation of a father. This is non-negotiable. Hopefully, this active role fosters an intimate relationship between father and child grounded in an appreciation and love exclusive to both involved parties. For example, approximately three years ago, my daughter was experiencing respiratory distress that prompted an expeditious visit to the emergency room. My wife needed to be home with our newborn son since, ironically, a hospital isn’t the best spot for a newborn outside of the initial birth. So I stayed with my daughter through a series of evaluations and treatments until she was discharged.
During the entirety of the event, I provided a calming and reassuring presence for her, as you can expect the circumstances would be quite frightening to a two-year-old. Now, some may think it odd, but I took pictures and videos during our stay in the hospital. I wanted to capture this moment in time; this moment that further strengthened our bond as father and daughter. To her, I was her protector – a source of depended comfort and safety. To me, she was my ward – simply my little baby girl. I had to be there for her. And every now and again – three years later – I still look at pictures and videos from those days we shared together. And upon viewing them, the emotions from that day come flooding back – in a positive way. Despite the circumstances, I cherish that time we shared together.
Now, I don’t assert that a father and child need to experience an extreme event to form a healthy, caring connection. However, I am asserting that a father should never shy away from moments with his kid(s), no matter how large or small. And he should embrace opportunity fully and make the most of it. Sure, a gentleman probably won’t engage in every waking event, but an honest effort is definitely demanded. There possibly can be a myriad of chances at a gentleman’s disposal: attending a recital, helping with homework, attending children’s school events, etc. Do not be mistaken, inaction is actually a conscious action. Gentlemen, as fathers, ensure the present-day with your kids isn’t a missed opportunity that becomes a distant past that you regret in the future. Make the most of your moments now!
Regarding my wet shave, I don’t require much to satisfy modest expectations for a pleasant experience. At the top of my list of expectations is a close, smooth, irritation-free shave. Due to skin sensitivity, I never utilize a blade directly on my face – no matter what a brand guarantees in terms of touting an irritation, bump-free experience. I simply cannot take the risk. Therefore, I only shave my neck area just beneath my chin. This area isn’t nearly as sensitive as my face. Nevertheless, I still administer care as I shave because ingrown hairs are still a distinct possibility. Typically, I shave during a hot shower so my skin is soft and pliable, and I employ the usage of a good shave gel. The thicker and slicker the lather, the greater the barrier between the blade and my skin. Jesse Jimz Prime Cut – a shave oil I am current trialing – aims to eliminate the need for a shave gel altogether. Founded by Jesse Jimenez, Jesse Jimz is a premium line of skincare products for discerning gentlemen that desire more from their grooming products. Prime Cut is formulated with ingredients such as jojoba oil, vitamin E, and apricot kernel oil to help sooth and nourish the skin for an irritation-free wet shave. Without the presence of a robust lather, I was curious how my skin would react to just a shaving oil. Now, let’s talk performance.
Without question, interviewing for a new position can be a source of tremendous stress and anxiety. And it is this stress and anxiety that can cloud one’s thoughts, disrupt critical thinking, and impair the ability to communicate coherently. I have conducted or participated in a ridiculous amount of interviews during the past 5 years, and without question, not answering an interview question ranks very high amongst possible interview missteps. For clarification, I am not referring to a candidate simply refusing to answer an interviewer’s query. I am referring to a candidate missing the mark and not understanding what is being asked so a proper response can be formulated. It occurs all the time – trust me. If I am really trying to obtain information required to make a fair assessment, I will ask follow-up questions to unearth some nugget of valuable content. And again, sometimes, the candidate swings and misses for a second time. If you are reading this, and nerves get the better of you in interviews, or you simply need a little more polish – keep reading below for some helpful guidance.
The professional gentleman has always had a complicated, love-hate relationship with the concept of business casual. It is somewhat of an oxymoron is it not – business, yet casual? Business was business, and casual was casual. Nevertheless, the backend of the 20th century introduced an amalgamation of a business and casual option for gentlemen. Now the lines were strangely blurred. The ambiguity resulted in decades of indecisiveness regarding menswear and dress codes within the confines of corporate America. To be fair, there were some gentlemen that successfully navigated these new uncharted sartorial waters. Meanwhile, a bevy of others stumbled through the exercise quite literally with mixed outcomes.
To be absolutely certain, the Cole Haan ZeroGrand Stitchlite is ridiculously lightweight. In all seriousness, the accompanying shoebox literally feels empty when you pick it up. Why? Well, the ZeroGrand Stitchlite jettisons the leather, welt, cork, stacked heel, and whatever materials that lend weight to a gentleman’s shoe. Instead, the ZeroGrand Stitchlite employs construction that would generally be associated with an athletic sneaker. First, the Stitchlite’s upper is constructed with the following materials: 23% wool, 7% baby alpaca, 40% nylon, and 30% polyester. The fabric has incredible flexibility and breathability. It is water-resistant, but not waterproof.
After Donuts with Dad, I drove to the office to begin my workday. A quick word about the office: sitting at a desk all day can be hazardous to a gentleman’s health. A sedentary lifestyle in the office can lead to obesity, high pressure, high cholesterol, and high blood sugar. Health experts recommend that a workforce trapped within the confines of a cubicle environment should dedicate time during the day for periodic standing and walking. It is not uncommon to see fellow colleagues switch out their standard dress shoes for sneakers as they take walk breaks during the workday. However, with the ZeroGrand, the requirement to switch shoes is all but eliminated. You can perform periodic walks around the office and look great in the process. Now, let’s dive a little deeper with what may be deemed as favorable or unfavorable for the gentleman.
A man who fails to meet or exceed the level of expectation that he smugly demands of others should abstain from such demands in the first place. Intoxicated by grandiose delusions of false importance, said individual will never earn a modicum of respect from his peers, as he will be viewed as a fraud lacking substance and depth. Effective leadership does not consist of hollow rhetoric and anemic work ethic. Effective leadership does not belittle or ignore other viewpoints. An acolyte of arrogance, a practitioner of presumption and pretentiousness – please expect the absence of any deference from other individuals. You will duly receive what you give. A gentleman shall be judged by his deeds and examples. Ensure that you uphold the same standard you will hold others accountable for. Otherwise, a gentleman will never be an owner of credibility. Own your standard. Reinforce your credibility. Rightfully earn respect from your peers.
At its core, a gentleman’s style is fiercely intimate; it is a sartorial expression of one’s personality and identity. It is a representation and presentation of self. More than a decade ago when I made the conscious decision to overhaul my look, I was very mindful regarding my selection of men’s clothing and accessories. Being quiet and reserved, I wanted my attire to typify my character with an appreciation for modesty, grace, and class. That being said, it is very important that a gentleman adopt a level of consistency, as in a signature look that identifies him readily to the public. Underrated, but an item that can definitely be classified as a signature is the gentleman’s hat. Think Samuel L. Jackson’s Kangol. Ne-Yo’s fedora. Walter White’s Heisenberg pork pie. Or Cam Newton’s…wait…scratch the last example; but you get the point.
And so, given my struggle with stubborn hair follicles, hats were an easy choice to incorporate into my burgeoning ensemble. Much like Samuel L. Jackson, I hold an affinity for the driver cap and schoolboy cap. This particular style of hat is a perfect business casual and casual companion. Generally, I don’t wear hats in the summer because of my propensity to sweat, and an additional garment layer only increases my body temperature. Autumn, early winter, and spring present the perfect opportunity to showcase a stylish brim. Pictured here is a birthday gift from my wife – a plaid wool driver cap from venerable brand Stetson. The Stetson brand has been making fashionable hats since 1865, and this hat is not any different. I spotted this handsome selection in Von Maur during a leisurely stroll during my lunch. I am a simple man, so birthday gifts for myself aren’t terribly difficult to select. Appropriate for the season, this grey wool driver cap boasts an all-over plaid with hues of olive, purple, blue, and burgundy.