A concerned observation from a regular gentleman: An alarming number of modern men are afflicted with an impotence of integrity, intelligence, courage, and decency. And in a desperate measure to address said deficiencies, men have turned to an addictive narcotic, hoping to stimulate and erect their seemingly flaccid manhood – power. Utilized to advance the common good for society, power can be an invaluable tool wielded by the correct individual. However, power contained within the cold, calculating clasp of the callous can lead to calamitous consequences. Without question power is responsibility. Luke 12:48 states, “But he who did not know, yet committed things deserving of stripes, shall be beaten with few. For everyone to whom much is given, from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more.” As men, much is required, and we must govern ourselves accordingly.
And so, I offer an unequivocal, unapologetic opinion: There are too many men entrusted with power that are not responsible. Trafficking tension and weaponizing woe for personal profit, they cleverly utilize influence to intoxicate the masses. Beware of madness, mediocrity, and misogyny masquerading beneath a makeshift mask of masculinity. Do not be seduced by the sounds of melodic misinformation. And train one’s eyes and ears to identify empty bluster in a frail attempt to slyly conceal cowardice. For fear is an instrument wielded by individuals endowed with ineptitude and engulfed with insecurity. To be certain, a righteous gentleman will stand ten toes down on principles that are sound. A righteous gentleman understands that his masculinity is grounded in truth, dignity, honor, and respect. His strength is divinely designed to serve society and its people, as there is providential power in his purpose. I pray that you are living in your power to add virtue, morality, and goodness to this shared experience we call life.
To be absolutely certain, the emotional and mental anguish is undeniable. And sometimes the anguish manifests itself physically – scars indelibly, indiscriminately tattooing the body. It is a pain that enjoys a perpetual downpour of torrential hate; roots strengthening its grasp within the fertile soil of the human spirit, rendering it barren of dignity or hope. Starved of equality and justice, our humanity has become emaciated from being forcibly fed prejudice, privilege, and hate. To be absolutely certain, it is an exhausting exercise of suffering. However, we should never allow ourselves to become so starved for justice and equality that we become equal participants in the deprivation of our own humanity. The oppressed should never adopt the identity or ideology of the oppressor. We should never debase our ethics and morality to achieve a perceived modicum of equal footing. Because, once that choice is made, the reason behind the mission is compromised. To be unambiguous, we should never acquiesce to indignant ignorance, idiocy, and ill will. The expectation is daunting, and honestly, the burden of righteousness and virtue should not lie with the persecuted. Yet, I call upon you to stand fierce in righteousness, honor, and goodness. Do not be mistaken, moral strength and conviction can be righteously weaponized to strike down animus, and dismantle systemic injustice that is intentionally injurious to the under-served and disenfranchised. Hold firm to your integrity and values, as our will must be stronger than the status quo of moral corruption, we stand steadfast and will overcome.
Despite modern, progressive viewpoints regarding the construct of masculinity here in America; society at large is sometimes guilty of perpetuating and reinforcing stereotypes that it seemingly discourages. It is an interesting bit of hypocrisy. I found it particularly amusing when popular men’s magazines – looking at you GQ – had the temerity to lecture men about the perceived current disrepair of manhood while completely ignoring their culpability and literary sins regarding the topic. It wasn’t long ago that men’s fashion didn’t fawn over the wildly popular show Mad Men and its resident alpha male Don Draper. Mad Men – toxic masculinity personified but stylishly portrayed with critical acclaim. From the appearance of the latest GQ offerings, I surmise that it isn’t trendy anymore. Oh, how soon they forget. Now, I won’t pretend there aren’t bad actors out there that don’t represent the best of the male population. They are great in number. Yet those men have become the archetype for all things toxic, negative, and dysfunctional about men as a whole. Lost in the shuffle of a culture war (waged across social media, television, publications, etc.) revolving around gender roles and expectations; we are ignorant of a sect of regular gentlemen that is perhaps more indicative of manhood than what is portrayed in the mainstream – invisible to the general public.
To be sure, the thoughtful gentleman understands that every moment of significance carries meaning. Moments matter. This is especially true for the gentleman that has embarked upon the journey of fatherhood. Understandably, the journey is an arduous one, replete with important occasions that beg the focused attention and participation of a father. This is non-negotiable. Hopefully, this active role fosters an intimate relationship between father and child grounded in an appreciation and love exclusive to both involved parties. For example, approximately three years ago, my daughter was experiencing respiratory distress that prompted an expeditious visit to the emergency room. My wife needed to be home with our newborn son since, ironically, a hospital isn’t the best spot for a newborn outside of the initial birth. So I stayed with my daughter through a series of evaluations and treatments until she was discharged.
