I am perfectly cognizant of the reality that traditions change as time progresses with each successive decade after the last. Behavior and culture from, say, 1950 is decidedly different from that of 2013. Nevertheless, there exists a few key behavioral attributes that have weathered the ever-transforming landscape of gentlemanly conduct. Whether referred to it as displaying the correct etiquette or possessing proper manners; there are certain standards that are resolutely non-negotiable. For instance, it is widely assumed that a gentleman should remove his hat when entering a home, a restaurant, an institution of worship, or any venue that demands deference. Walking into a funeral with your cap twisted to the side? Stop it. Wearing an over-sized cap at the dinner table? Absolutely not! Now, if this is common knowledge to you, I would highly recommended forwarding this post to any guy that is oblivious to this fact. Seriously, you would be surprised, or perhaps not, at the number of men who are unaware of hat etiquette. Now, will the world implode if you rock your hat indoors. Certainly not. But that is not point. It is paramount that a gentleman display proper form, especially in the presence of lady. And it also silently communicates to a young, impressionable male that you have code that entails dignity, respect, and tact – never a bad thing to have.
What is common sense to us maybe new wisdom to others. I will forward this straight away and thanks for the response kind sir.
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Very true. It is my hopes that posts like these find their into schools and assist in enlightening a young man.
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Glen, I agree wholeheartedly. I remove my hat/cap whenever I enter a building. What are your thoughts on folks that question traditional standards as antiquated; or see old values as merely means of assimilation and indoctrination?
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I suppose there are some traditions that can be viewed as antiquated, but I honestly feel there has been an erosion of values and manners over the years. So, the question becomes: Are we better with or without traditional values that govern a general, gentlemanly code? I think we are better with them. I mean, I cannot quote a scientific study to back my point, and a guy can display all the right values and still be a heathen, but overall I think proper manners is a good indicator of refinement. And really it just comes down to respect, dignity, and grace. We owe it to our women, our children, ourselves, and our Lord. But that’s just my opinion.
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There’s a difference in standards being antiquated and society evolving and standards being thrown to the wayside and disregarded. I remember having to tell my cousin to remove his hat in our grandmother’s house when she passed away. Better to hear it from me, a cousin only 2 years older, than an elder in the community. I’m often stunned by the number of me I see wearing hats/caps in restaurants and other inappropriate venues.
While times will and should change, respect for yourself, your surroundings and those you share your company with should not be forgotten.
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I enjoy your articles tremendously. I am posting this one to my Facebook page, The Classic Gentleman’s Guide. Keep up the excellent work.
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Depends on restaurant no? Morton’s yes, Chilli’s no. Same with building. Really depends on type of venue and whether or not demonstrating some measure of respect is necessary. Enjoy your posts.
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Personally, if I am sitting down for a meal, I would still remove my hat – even at Chili’s. As for buildings, I guess it would depend on if it is a public venue like an airport or sports venue. And thanks for reading.
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The only place I might consider leaving my hat on is in a bar. I’d only consider leaving it on in that situation if I were alone or with buddies. If I were with a lady, I would remove it.
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I can see a casual environment like that, but I get warm pretty fast, so I would still probably remove mine for comfort.
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