The Standard #60

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On the arduous, sometimes uneven path of a gentleman’s life, it is paramount to remain firmly grounded in gratitude. Trust and truly believe: Tribulation must be tempered by sincere thankfulness. Afterall, life’s journey can be wrought with pain, sadness, and an uncertainty that can methodically erode one’s spirit – if one’s fortitude lacks the necessary strength to allow it. Now, it is important to be mindful that during this continuous journey, a gentleman’s thoughts become a loyal, steadfast companion. And when adversity wounds the spirit, those thoughts stubbornly can bind to mental and emotional hurt. It is an unhealthy marriage of pain and familiarity.

Because, when hurt is intense and intimate, sometimes we subconsciously cling to events that aggrieve us the most. It is a perplexing, discomforting comfort. However, preoccupation with past pain can prohibit a productive future and preclude a pleasing present. Life is too important, too deceivingly fleeting to sacrifice energy on the altar of regret and woe. The blessings of today beg much-required attention. Today, compile a list of things/events that require praise and thanks. And so, when life presents challenges or your thoughts drift away to revisit sadness, refer to your list to offer levity, clarity, and balance. Lift up your heart with graciousness and celebrate the life you deserve.

Black Thought – Authenticity

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“Authenticity is my rebellion.” – Viola Davis

Trust and be assured, you possess an extraordinary power when you hold fast to your authentic self. Emboldened with unwavering confidence and a stubborn commitment to one’s core values; you will not acquiesce or conform to either popular trends or a status quo that stand in sharp contrast to your own principles. And while being exposed to a variety of opposing, external influences; you remain unbothered and unaffected because you are rooted unmistakably in your truth. Sometimes, you boldly swim against a powerful current of popular opinion. Now, such rebellion could be met with certain labels. And that is okay. It is what defines our uniqueness. The definition of self must be written by its author. And you are the author of your own book – ghost writers need not apply. To be your true self is what grants you strength, courage, and drive. Absent hesitation, regret, or embarrassment; your rebellion is your originality. Trust and be assured, your authenticity is unapologetically you and only you.

The Standard #36

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To be sure, it is certainly not common for self-esteem issues to be discussed in respect to adult males. Surely, any deeply rooted issues regarding self-respect and self-worth should have been addressed and resolved during adolescence and early adulthood. At least that is what some people hold to be true. However, this misguided belief is not grounded in reality. Being a male does not preclude one from experiencing tribulations that weigh heavily on the heart and mind. If there is a certainty that a gentleman can rely upon; it is the certainty that life will continue transpire as long as he continues to live. And as such, there may be a myriad of life events that may call into question the value of a gentleman’s worth, well, at least within his own psyche.

Nonetheless, please understand, a gentleman should never allow adverse circumstances or another individual’s profound insecurity to diminish or corrode his worth. Life is stained with imperfection and no one has been granted immunity from its reach. What a gentleman may perceive as flaw or failure; there is fertile opportunity for triumph and happiness. Embrace your imperfections. Welcome your flaws. And then proceed to put in the work to be a better you. However, do not act to please another individual or individuals. This is for you. Your worth is not predicated upon the integrity of someone else’s opinion. Your worth is predicated upon the fact that you are your own unique individual: confident, strong, happy, successful, and great. You just have to believe. I believe in your greatness, and so should you.